


impossible to ignore

by freyq (antiva)



Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: M/M, Mutual Pining, Self-Indulgent, discussion of transition, takes place mid spring in hieron, throndir/red jack implied
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-30 03:56:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20808125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antiva/pseuds/freyq
Summary: “I've got something to share,” he grins as Ephrim looks back at him, and opens the lid to reveal elegantly packed chocolates. Ephrim stares at them suspiciously.





	impossible to ignore

**Author's Note:**

> hey this is my first published thing for this fandom!! i'm rusty but i just love them so much
> 
> also i just wrote this in one sitting don't look at me

The last bits of daylight fall into Ephrim's chambers through the stained glass windows, lazy and slow as if they dragged themselves in unwillingly. It's quiet; the noises of the evening do not reach the upper floors.  
  
Ephrim lights a candle and squints to find the straps hidden in the underside of his cape; he fumbles for a second, then it comes off. He makes quick work of the rest of his armor and digs through his drawers for a fresh nightshirt.  
  
As he's combing tangles out of his hair, there's a knock at the door. He pauses.  
  
“Corsica?”  
  
No response. Another knock. He sighs and puts the comb away, then opens the door.  
  
“Hey,” says Throndir, his face slightly flushed. “You need better ventilation in these stairways.”  
  
He looks handsome: Ephrim usually sees him roughened by the hard work around the settlement, clothes practical and slightly stained with grass and earth. It's obvious he's washed up and changed – he still looks casual, but the linen shirt he's wearing looks unworn, and his hair is brushed and neatly tied back. Ephrim steps back, gesturing for him to get in.  
  
“Are there any important matters to discuss?” he asks and winces, unable to drop his Lord voice just yet. Throndir gives him a smile.  
  
“No, I've just missed you.”  
  
There it is. That warm honesty Throndir has for everyone, all the time. It's expected, but Ephrim doesn't know how to deal with being at the receiving end of it.  
  
“Sure,” he says, because he doesn't know what to say. “Just... I'm tired. Don't expect me to be... exuberant.”  
  
“Can I sit down?”  
  
Ephrim nods and leads him to the couch. His chambers aren't the most decorative, simply as a matter of maintenance: he does not like anyone coming in to clean for him. The couch is a pleasant leather, some furs and pillows thrown over it for comfort and warmth. “I'll light the fire.”  
  
As he works, Throndir reaches into his satchel and pulls out a small box. “I've got something to share,” he grins as Ephrim looks back at him, and opens the lid to reveal elegantly packed chocolates. Ephrim stares at them suspiciously. “Before you say anything, it's not a gift! Well, not specifically one I got for you anyways.”  
  
“Good. We'd have words about this otherwise,” Ephrim returns to work getting the fire started, perhaps blushing a little. It's from the effort, he tells himself. And the lack of good ventilation. Yes. The ventilation.  
  
“Blue J. got them for me,” Throndir's voice shakes a little, and Ephrim smiles. “For... I don't know what for. They just said it was a thank you.”  
  
“You know what it's for.”  
  
A happy sigh. “Yeah, I know.”  
  
A few months ago, Throndir reached out to Ephrim with a request for help – contacts and resources, for Blue J., who had approached him to ask whether there were any books at the library concerning Oni biology. There were not, which was unsurprising but still disappointing; they agreed to his suggestion that they talk to the Lord of the University himself about finding a physician who would help them out. Yesterday, Blue J. was able to receive their first potion – similar to the ones had by Rosana and multiple other people at the settlement, but adjusted to their body.  
  
Finally satisfied with the flame making its way up in the fireplace, Ephrim sits down next to Throndir. Warm green eyes immediately look right into his, and he doesn't know what to do with himself, so he takes one of the chocolates.  
  
“I wonder where they got these. They're very beautifully made,” he says, unwrapping one to see a beautiful swirl of a shape. He hesitates before pulling it out completely. “It's your gift, though, you should have the first one,” he says, offering it to Throndir.  
  
Throndir laughs and takes it, fingers brushing against Ephrim's own in the gesture. Ephrim's too old to blush at that part.  
  
“They said -- They said it was. Oh, they were so awkward about it. They said it was... ” Throndir's unable to finish, suddenly visibly emotional. The light of the flame highlights the moisture gathering in the corners of his eyes. They don't seem to be sad tears; Ephrim smiles at him.  
  
“It was...?”  
  
“...'Dad chocolates,'” he forces out with a laugh, and finally puts the chocolate in his mouth.  
  
“Oh, Throndir.”  
  
“What?”  
  
Ephrim reaches out and puts his hand over Throndir's own. “And you were surprised by that?”  
  
“Oh, I. I don't know?” he laughs again, muffled through the chocolate he's still savoring. “I'm just... I never thought they would say it like that. Red Jack --”  
  
“Red Jack also thinks of you as a father of theirs,” Ephrim finally takes his hand off Throndir's to reach for a chocolate, but notices the way Throndir's fingers tighten on his for a moment, as if not wanting to let go.  
  
Throndir sighs. “Either way, this is thanks to you, too. So I wanted to share these with you.”  
  
Ephrim's too-formal response sounds muffled through the chocolate in his mouth. “I have resources. I could help with your request, so I did.”  
  
“Oh come on, don't act like you don't care about that kid, too.”  
  
Ephrim swallows and takes a deep breath. “You're right. I would have done all I could, either way.”  
  
“Now we're talking.” Throndir smiles warmly. There it is, Ephrim doesn't know how to take it, yet again. “Thank you, truly.”  
  
“Okay, stop now and eat the chocolates.” Ephrim gets up to tend to the fire. He's a little clumsy about it, too used to calling flame from his hand, but Throndir knows not to help.  
  
He sits back down and helps himself to another chocolate; a pleasant silence accompanies them as they both eat. Ephrim stares at the fire, painfully aware that Throndir is watching him.  
  
“Hey,” Throndir starts in a hushed voice. “Isn't it lonely up here?”  
  
“It's quiet.” Ephrim doesn't want to talk about this.  
  
Throndir sees his dejection and hesitates before continuing. “I mean. It does get quite noisy down there, even in the forest. But, you know, at least everyone can always find me if they need me.”  
  
“They can find me here, too, if it's important.”  
  
Throndir sits up and looks at him with those damn warm eyes, and Ephrim isn't looking back but he Knows, “Aren't you important enough?”  
  
Ephrim reaches for another chocolate.  
  
“I understand that you need privacy, I do. Your work is difficult and I could not do what you do, but,” Throndir puts his hand on Ephrim's shoulder, “maybe we can... maybe people can help.”  
  
Ephrim swallows. “I appreciate your visit.” He still can't make himself look back at Throndir's earnest expression. He ignores the hand.  
  
“Ephrim,” Throndir just says.  
  
Ephrim finally looks back.  
  
“Please don't. Don't try to become a stranger.” Throndir's other hand reaches up to his jaw, slowly, tentatively, as if waiting for him to reject it.  
  
“I'm not,” Ephrim just whispers, finding himself too weak to use his voice. The fire is still reflected in Throndir's eyes. Ephrim wishes it wasn't there. “I'm not. I promise.”  
  
Throndir gives a nod. “Thank you.”  
  
Their knees are touching. Ephrim closes his eyes and feels a thumb stroke his cheekbone, tender.  
  
He almost forgets-  
  
The hand is gone with a gentle stroke along his jaw. “I should go,” Throndir says.  
  
Ephrim opens his eyes. The chocolate box has a single piece left in it. “Yeah. Thank you for the chocolates.”  
  
“I'll pass that to Blue J.,” Throndir laughs and stands up. “I'll see myself out. Goodnight,” and he heads towards the door.  
  
Ephrim doesn't ask him to stay.

**Author's Note:**

> it's all about the yearning am i right


End file.
